Hello, my pretties! I am the One Eyed Cook of the West! in case your brain is too tiny to know, I am a cyclops! Do you know what cyclopses eat? You don't? That's surprising. I eat humans! when I catch you, I will cook you into my favorite dish! You will be made into Human Chowder! Even if I don't catch you, I will cook other things, like ogre guts and pig feet. I don't do much of anything else. All I really do is cook. I don't know what I would do what I would do without my kitchen! Leave me and my kitchen in peace. GET OUT!!!!

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